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  1. RB26DETT is offline Banned
    Location: Manila, Philippines
    Posts: 5,389

    #1

    Default Why England should be the 51st state of America



  2. Microphone is offline #Myk2016
       
    Location: England
    Posts: 7,948

    #2

    Default

    Link doesnt work

    Also, if that ever happened, I think there would be quite a protest

    Absolutely the most super of all the non-super moderators Your friendly community moderator.

  3. RB26DETT is offline Banned
    Location: Manila, Philippines
    Posts: 5,389

    #3

    Default

    hmmm. i'll paste it here.

    No flaming! I found it funny!

    Dear Sir. Hubert TC. William Buxomley, Duke of Cobham,

    I read your letter arguing for the re-incorporation of America into the British Empire. Your arguments have caused a literal eruption of my spleen. (BTW, I'll be sending you my medical bills, as the American health care system is spotty at best.) As we celebrate our 232nd year of blissful independence from the hated Red Coats, perhaps it's time to finally make amends. And by make amends, I mean surrender to us entirely.

    Here is how we (us) will both (just us) benefit from making England a permanent part of the States. (We're going to conquer you.)

    Food
    Yeah, yeah, it's a cliché that your food is terrible. But you know the funny thing about cliches? They're usually true. Have you ever actually tasted blood pudding? (Though you did have the brilliant idea to pair fried fish with French fries. I would applaud you if my hands weren't currently covered in Cheet-o dust.) Give us five minutes with your so-called bangers and mash, and they'll be wrapped in bacon and sandwiched and between two Krispy Kremes before you can say "bob's your uncle." (Why do you people say that? From now on you speak American in the 51st state: "New England East.")

    More reasons after the jump.



    Gossip
    Granted, much of America's current tabloid culture originated in the United Kingdom. Therefore, after your inevitable submission, we will combine our celeb mags into one all-powerful, all-seeing "super rag." No celebrity will be safe. The Olsens will quake in their Ugg boots. Hayden Panettiere will think twice before taking her dog on a stroll to Starbucks. And Amy Winehouse will continue to act like a crackhead vagabond. (P.S., you can keep her.)

    TV
    This one's a no-brainer. Ninety percent of our shows come from the U.K. anyway. At this point it would just be easier to air whatever you're showing on the BBC right now. You've got like four of them, might as well share the wealth. And your "Big Brother" has way more cleavage than ours. (And no Julie Chen.)

    Landmarks

    Put simply, you have too many. Big Ben? Who needs a clock anymore when everyone's got cell phones? Moving forward, all of your landmarks will be used to sell ad space. Trafalgar Square will henceforth be known as Boost Mobile Plaza. Tower of London? Trump Tower: Ol' Blimey. And Parliament? Dave & Buster's.

    Sienna Miller
    Failing all of the above, America demands that an immediate "declaration" for the "independence" of Sienna Miller be drawn up. (She was born in New York City, after all.) Once the emancipation of Sienna is complete (and she's liberated more often from her clothing), she'll be free to become a permanent fixture in American films, television, and the fantasies of 13-year-old boys. Sienna has been under the tyranny of the Queen for far too long. (Stop sniveling, you get Heidi Montag as a trade.)

    We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all people are created equal. Except for the Red Coats.

    Happy 4th,
    Joe Bob McBaldEagleton

  4. iBilo is offline ;)
     
    Location: UK
    Posts: 2,119

    #4

    Default

    Rofl, brilliant +Rep.

    EDIT: Can't I have to spread my rep.


  5. Microphone is offline #Myk2016
       
    Location: England
    Posts: 7,948

    #5

    Default

    Do me a favour, Kill Joe Bob McBaldEagleton XD

    Absolutely the most super of all the non-super moderators Your friendly community moderator.

  6. RB26DETT is offline Banned
    Location: Manila, Philippines
    Posts: 5,389

    #6

    Default

    slow death or a quick one?

  7. Microphone is offline #Myk2016
       
    Location: England
    Posts: 7,948

    #7

    Default

    Your choice

    Absolutely the most super of all the non-super moderators Your friendly community moderator.

  8. iBilo is offline ;)
     
    Location: UK
    Posts: 2,119

    #8

    Default

    Boraz! Use the rubber fist!!!


  9. ShadowGT is offline I <3 Boobies!
     
    Location: Melbourne, Australia
    Posts: 3,198

    #9

    Default

    I don't get it........

    Leader & Founder of the "Ponies of War" Gaming Comunity

  10. iBilo is offline ;)
     
    Location: UK
    Posts: 2,119

    #10

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ShadowGT »
    I don't get it........
    You have to have had spent some time or lived in England to get it.


  11. Iced_Bullet is offline Cheese=Milk's Death Route
     
    Location: Norfolk, UK
    Posts: 6,310

    #11

    Default

    It's really not funny at all!
    Life is good. Simples. Cccchhhhh.

  12. Camel is offline Legendary Classic
      
    Posts: 11,510

    #12

    Default

    No, I don't find this funny either. I would find the closest bridge and make the leap

  13. hesonly5 is offline Hungry Hungry Hippos! :D
     
    Location: UK
    Posts: 2,983

    #13

    Default

    Oh good, I thought it was just me that didn't get it

  14. Nige is offline Buy American ....
    Location: Calgary, AB
    Posts: 888

    #14

    Default

    'Why the United Kingdom should be the 51st state of America'

    Not England, the United Kingdom I don't believe that all 4 countries should be seperate imo, but thats for another thread.


    Anyway given the choice of either the European Union or United States, I gotta say I would rather be a partner of the States rather than the European Union .
    Canada 2010 Ice Hockey Winter Olympic Gold Medal winners!

  15. YeOldeTDUMan is offline working too much
     
    Location: ?
    Posts: 1,463

    #15

    Default

    sorry ... have read far better jokes along those lines ...
    I'd rather be topless !

  16. Baltoman is offline Baby Vipah :D
    Location: Espírito Santo, Brazil
    Posts: 3,618

    #16

    Default

    LMAO, what a joke. Every day there would be civil wars. Although I do luv both Countries <3

    Quote Originally Posted by Iced_Bullet »
    It's really not funny at all!
    Quote Originally Posted by mellors »
    No, I don't find this funny either. I would find the closest bridge and make the leap
    Com'on guys, its just a joke. *Its not really gonna happen*

  17. Iced_Bullet is offline Cheese=Milk's Death Route
     
    Location: Norfolk, UK
    Posts: 6,310

    #17

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Baltoman »
    Com'on guys, its just a joke. *Its not really gonna happen*
    I know it's not going to happen. The content of the "letter" or w/e was very unfunny. I didn't even smile once. Which is the point I'm trying to make.

    E: Correction. I smiled at the end. Once I'd realised it was completly unfunny and pointless!
    Life is good. Simples. Cccchhhhh.

  18. Baltoman is offline Baby Vipah :D
    Location: Espírito Santo, Brazil
    Posts: 3,618

    #18

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Iced_Bullet »
    I know it's not going to happen. The content of the "letter" or w/e was very unfunny. I didn't even smile once. Which is the point I'm trying to make.

    E: Correction. I smiled at the end. Once I'd realised it was completly unfunny and pointless!
    here we go

  19. Iced_Bullet is offline Cheese=Milk's Death Route
     
    Location: Norfolk, UK
    Posts: 6,310

    #19

    Default

    Wa? You said common, it's a joke, when I didn't find it funny, so I replied. Am I not allowed to now xD ??
    Life is good. Simples. Cccchhhhh.

  20. Camel is offline Legendary Classic
      
    Posts: 11,510

    #20

    Default

    I know it's not going to happen, I don't remember saying that it would happen.


 
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