Results 1 to 14 of 14

  1. DriftNismo is offline 87 Civic GT
    Location: London, UK
    Posts: 1,643

    #1

    Default Funny Call Centre Recordings

    I was just looking through my sent box on Yahoo from a few years ago and found this, i laughed so hard at the last one.

    The last one is great.

    Actual call centre conversations!!!!!
    Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?"
    Operator: "Where did you get that number from, Madam?"
    Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre".
    Operator: " Madam, they are our opening hours".

    ------------------------------------------------------------------------
    Samsung Electronics
    Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
    Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about".
    Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
    Operator: "I think you mean the telephone point on the wall".

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    RAC Motoring Services
    Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am travelling in Australia?"
    Operator: Doesn't the product give you a clue?

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France):
    "If I register my car in France, do I have to change the steering wheel to the other side of the car?"

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Directory Enquiries
    Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff please".
    Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"
    Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off".

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.
    Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"
    Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland".

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: "I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on".

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Tech Support:
    "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
    Customer: "OK".
    Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?".
    Customer: "No".
    Tech Support: "OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
    Customer: "No".
    Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?".
    Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the 'OK' button displayed?"
    Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I need it. If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?".

    ----------------------------------------------------------------------
    There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired.
    This is a true story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause".

    Actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee, (Now I know why they record these conversations!):

    Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance; May I help you?"
    Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
    Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
    Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."
    Operator: "Went away?"
    Caller: "They disappeared."
    Operator: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
    Caller: "Nothing."
    Operator: "Nothing??"
    Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
    Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
    Caller: "How do I tell?"
    Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
    Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
    Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
    Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."
    Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
    Caller: "What's a monitor?"
    Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
    Caller: "I don't know."
    Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
    Caller: "Yes, I think so."
    Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall"
    Caller: "Yes, it is."
    Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
    Caller: "No."
    Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
    Caller: "Okay, here it is."
    Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."
    Caller: "I can't reach."
    Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
    Caller: "No."
    Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over??"
    Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."
    Operator: "Dark??"
    Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window "
    Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
    Caller: "I can't."
    Operator: "No? Why not??"
    Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
    Operator: "A power.............. A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in??"
    Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
    Operator: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought
    it from."
    Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
    Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
    Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
    Operator: "Tell them you're too f*%king stupid to own a computer".
    Last edited by DriftNismo; 13/04/08 at 22:03 PM.


  2. hesonly5 is offline Hungry Hungry Hippos! :D
     
    Location: UK
    Posts: 2,983

    #2

    Default

    LOL! That last one was brilliant xD

    I remember hearing about some woman who dialled 999 because she couldn't find Homebase and needed directions, lol.

  3. macd79 is offline Chuck Norris
    Location: Glasgow, Scotland.
    Posts: 531

    #3

    Default

    ROFL at that last one

    E8400 @ 4.34GHz | HD4870 @ 790/4400 | Corsair XMS2 4GB | Asus P5Q-E | Corsair 750W PSU | Antec 1200 | WD 320 SE16 | G25 | G15 | G9x |

  4. Camel is offline Legendary Classic
      
    Posts: 11,510

    #4

    Default

    LOL they were funny but i had some better ones from when i was on my work experience last year, I just wish that i wrote some of them down

  5. Rtoups is offline The Cool
    Location: Los Angeles
    Posts: 128

    #5

    Default

    Here are some funny 999 calls (with the Homebase one in it, whatever Homebase is).
    If the video above doesn't show click here to view it.

    Funny 911 (American equivalent of 999)Some redneck got attacked by a deer, and a dog:
    If the video above doesn't show click here to view it.

    This one is funny. 4 year old needs help with math:
    If the video above doesn't show click here to view it.

    This guy is in distress because he can't get his mouse to work"
    If the video above doesn't show click here to view it.
    Please edit your signature to be within the new forum guidelines, thanks.

  6. Camel is offline Legendary Classic
      
    Posts: 11,510

    #6

    Default

    how do these people survive?

  7. Aquila DK is offline is Tom Kristensen :D
    Location: Denmark
    Posts: 840

    #7

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mellors »
    how do these people survive?
    Sometimes you really have to wonder that.. GOD, it's just common sense most of it! O.o

    "Supercars are designed to mess with G forces, hypercars are designed to mess with G strings." - Jeremy Clarkson
    Noobs are great, everybody should own one

  8. DriftNismo is offline 87 Civic GT
    Location: London, UK
    Posts: 1,643

    #8

    Default

    Lmao, that 4 year old girl was funny. I don't remember doing stuff like 16 - 8 when i was 4 though and we're a year ahead of the US so i don't know why she was doing it. And the mouse one is just stupid, i can't believe how stupid that guy is lmao. And the deer one, "Who gets the deer, me or the dog?!" lmao. Oh, and Homebase is like Home Depot in the UK.

  9. ShadowGT is offline I <3 Boobies!
     
    Location: Melbourne, Australia
    Posts: 3,198

    #9

    Default

    XD the redneck was funny.

    Leader & Founder of the "Ponies of War" Gaming Comunity

  10. Pherelas is offline I'm Going Slightly mad
    Location: The Dark Side of the Moon
    Posts: 3,278

    #10

    Default

    I thought the old women at the end of the first was brilliant but the americans are a lot more laid back about it arn't they.

    The last of the original first post ones was brilliant aswell.
    -----
    [imglink]http://i147.photobucket.com/albums/r289/pherelas/SigCustom.jpg[/imglink]
    . . . . . . Why is it always a wrong number, what if there in the wrong house? . . . . . . .

  11. Rtoups is offline The Cool
    Location: Los Angeles
    Posts: 128

    #11

    Default

    I guess so. It was probably in some random town where there never are emergencies. I live in Los Angeles, and I know people who have been put on hold when calling 911.
    Please edit your signature to be within the new forum guidelines, thanks.

  12. HavockJoker is offline PGR4 Master
    Location: New Jersey, USA
    Posts: 1,532

    #12

    Default

    OMG I was laughing so hard my soda came out of my nose. LMAO




  13. HavockJoker is offline PGR4 Master
    Location: New Jersey, USA
    Posts: 1,532

    #13

    Default

    this is old but still hilarious
    If the video above doesn't show click here to view it.




  14. Pherelas is offline I'm Going Slightly mad
    Location: The Dark Side of the Moon
    Posts: 3,278

    #14

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by KingSkyline »
    this is old but still hilarious
    Never seen that before lol, brilliant.
    -----
    [imglink]http://i147.photobucket.com/albums/r289/pherelas/SigCustom.jpg[/imglink]
    . . . . . . Why is it always a wrong number, what if there in the wrong house? . . . . . . .


 

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

about us

  • turboduck is a community that is dedicated to driving and racing games of all types on all platforms. Whether it's ticking off the miles/kilometres while exploring an open world, crashing and exploding everything in an insane balls-to-the-wall arcade racer, or nailing down every apex and trimming off every tenth possible in authentic sim-racing. It's all up for discussion as we enjoy the virtual cars, bikes, and everything else that these games offer. So join us, jump into the discussions, and don't think too much about why a 'duck' is our mascot. ;)
turboduck twitter turboduck facebook turboduck youtube turboduck twitter turboduck rss